What are your biggest challenges as a caregiver?  

I often find myself torn between the care needs of my husband and our daughter Tracy, who also fully relies on my care following a car accident in 2003. At the same time, I have to try to care for myself and deal with guilt of not being able to “fix” everything. I also worry about the burden I will leave behind for our older daughter, Tiffany, who will need to step in as caregiver and guardian for her sister and father, if something happens to me. I deal with these fears by reminding myself that I cannot control everything, that I can do my part with grace, and to give the rest to God.

Tell us who you are outside of the role of caregiver?

My greatest accomplishments and happiest moments are as a wife to my love of my life, a mom to my amazing daughters, and a nana to my beautiful grandsons. My family is my heart and soul, my raison d’etre, my soul purpose. I am also passionate about being an advocate for veterans, their caregivers, and families. I am trained in trauma-conscious yoga and have volunteered to teach yoga to veterans and their families with Connected Warriors several years ago. I have also volunteered with the Horses for Heroes Program and served on the board of Bit-By-Bit Medical Therapeutic Riding Center where my daughter Tracy did hippotherapy. I am currently a board member-at-large for the Wing of Aerospace Medical Association and on the advisory board at the VA State Nursing Home where my husband currently resides.

What advice would you give to other military and veteran caregivers?

While every caregiver journey is different, each contains many of the same ingredients: love, hard work, change, selfless sacrifice, feelings of helplessness, exhaustion and guilt, to name a few. One thing I learned is you don’t have to navigate these unchartered waters alone. Reaching out to other caregivers for sharing and support is what got me through the bumpy patches on this wild and crazy caregiver journey.