What are your biggest challenges as a caregiver?

Self-care is one of my biggest challenges. Finding balance and opportunities to feed my individuality so that I don’t burn out is a constant struggle. The lack of order and the ability to keep up with day-to-day housekeeping tasks can be overwhelming as well. Providing for the diverse needs of my multigenerational household is a very big challenge especially when different demands and needs may be competing at any given moment.

What have you learned about yourself through your role as a caregiver?

I have learned that I am resilient but not indestructible, so I must be intentional in getting my needs met as well. I have learned that I can “fight” for a cause with love leading the way. I have always hidden in the shadows until I had to stand up and advocate for my husband to get what he needs and deserves, and I learned that it’s okay to stand in the light for what’s good and right. Through caregiving I have also learned the strength of my voice and how much my words and actions can impact others.

What advice would you give to other military and veteran caregivers?

Do not give up. Get and stay connected with the military/veteran community. I know it sounds cliché, but sometimes connecting with others can give you a sense of purpose when you’re feeling hopeless. Remember that you matter. Selflessness is not the opposite of selfish. You do not have to sacrifice all of yourself. In fact, the better you take care of yourself, the better it is for the people you care for.